THE GATEWAY?

Barlowe,

My mother died recently, which brought up a whole bunch of buried stuff. Stuff I think you’d be interested in.

No, no. Don’t throw out this message just because of that, I know who I’m writing to. I’m not looking for sympathy or intend on going on about my life story. I say this so you know this is not my story. This is something that happened to my mother, and for reasons that I just told you, she can’t write to you herself. So I’m sorry for any inaccuracies. I’m just going off what I remember. 

A couple decades ago, when I was very young, my family lived in upstate New York, in Herkimer to be exact. Interestingly enough, we moved maybe a year or so after this out of the state entirely. Perhaps this is why. There was one day where my mom wasn’t home all day, leading my father to take care of me the whole day. And a few days after that, too, as when my mom had gotten home, she was sick. She was in bed all day. That was the only way I could describe it. After that, things went back to normal, save for my mom seeming to be more on-edge and paranoid more often. As well as the “we moved away shortly after”, of course. 

I didn’t find out what happened until honestly a year or so ago. She’d only started to tell me these bits and pieces of her past once she was certifiably on her deathbed, I guess. Like she wanted someone to remember, especially since my dad passed. I tried writing down what she could remember, what I was able to jot down, and here’s the basics of it: 

First, her disappearance that day wasn’t the first time. The first time was before I was born, before she even met my dad. Maybe 20 years before that, she said she was some kind of…test subject…? For the government. My mom was really old, and suffered from dementia at the end, so she couldn’t remember which, but she was confident that it was definitely some kind of government entity.

According to her, she was kept in some kind of tank and they tested her mind. She said they gave her medicine and put her in some kind of trance or meditative state. I tried Googling it after this session of her explaining this to me and the closest I could find was a sensory deprivation tank. She’d said something about hallucinating Grandpa while she was in there. That she swears she saw him and heard him. Something about aliens, too. And that matches these effects I read about, so do with that what you will. 

Apparently, they were supposed to call her back again. And I guess they didn’t, at least until that day she was MIA all day. When I tried prodding her to tell me more about that, she just waved me off and said it was to “help with what the test had put her through”, according to her. She didn’t want to because at this point it didn’t match with her beliefs, and plus I was in her life now, but she went anyway. She didn’t tell me why. I asked her what they did. The only response I got is that she “slept better”. But two days before her passing I had found her on the floor in the morning, sobbing. After I helped her back into bed, she started talking about a “gateway.” She kept going on about it, “it’s a gateway, a gateway to the universe. It’s a gateway to heaven. It’s a gateway to hell. It’s a gateway into your mind.” And so on.

Then she began to scream like something was there in the room with her, she was terrified of. Like she was hallucinating. It was insane and even I became scared, something was there. She was pointing in the corner asking me if I could see it. See him–the WORM MAN, she kept saying. It scared the shit out of me. Then on her death bed, she whispered in a raspy voice to me something I couldn’t quiet make out but it sounded like, “maggot or maga or magog.” I honestly have no idea wtf she meant at this point but it was another detail to add to the strange mystery that was unfolding.

Unfortunately, like I said, she lived to be very old, and her mind was already starting to fail when she let me know about all of this, so in terms of specific groups and places, she couldn’t give me that information. But I’ve been researching it, since I can’t get my mother’s experiences out of my mind since she told me, and all I can say is that it was in Herkimer County, in the valley. I know that for a fact, we lived near there and she lived there, too, when she was a younger adult. She talked about these different buildings and facilities, but the only one I could really track was “Boces”. Sorry that I don’t have more information. She didn’t tell me. 

I started looking into what possible government projects this could have been and started to scroll through some of the documents made public. I came across one in particular, from the CIA files, called the Gateway Process. I’ve attached a link here so you can see for yourself: https://www.cia.gov/readingroom/docs/cia-rdp96-00788r001700210016-5.pdf

In 1983, the CIA conducted an investigation known as the Gateway Process, documented in this report, "Analysis and Assessment of the Gateway Process". The Gateway Process investigation centered on exploring techniques aimed at altering human consciousness, with a particular emphasis on psychic research and remote viewing. The investigation explored the potential applications of the Gateway Experience, a training system developed by Robert Monroe and the Monroe Institute. Going out on a limb here but this seems exactly like what happened to my mom. Also I don’t think it’s a coincidence that she repeatedly muttered, “It’s a gateway…” over and over.

Do you have any prior info of this being done in the valley or any knowledge of it all?

I do hope none of this sounds crazy. But you seem to know about this kind of…stuff, so maybe you can parse together what Mom was talking about, even if only a little bit. Maybe you know the buildings, or you’re aware of exactly what happened already. You seem to be the expert on all the weird shit in the Mohawk valley and I honestly have nobody else to turn to. Hell, maybe you’re familiar with what my mother had gone through and are keen to any specifics about that. I don’t know. I hope this is enough, and you have my email if you need any more information. All in all, I just want more information on what happened to her, for my own closure and for my family’s and my own safety. And…just the reassurance that what she went through was real. Because she’d said that people thought she was weird the few times she tried to talk about it before me, and…I want to believe her. 

So help me. Any information is helpful. Anything. 

Sincerely,
Debbie V.